Advice I Wish I Had Before I Became A Mom

I remember leaving the hospital for the first time with my first son, Luke, with so many emotions. I was excited to bring him home but also nervous and overwhelmed because it was just going to be my husband and I. No nurses or doctors to help, just us in charge of a little human. How will we handle it? Unfortunately, babies do not come with an owners manual. It is all unknown territory and a huge learning curve that new parents must navigate and figure out all on our own.

There will be so many challenges, a lot of trial and error, but a lot of smiles and a lot of joy. It truly is a labor of love. Through it all, I have learned some things that I wish I would have been able to know before I brought my son home from the hospital for the first time. I compiled a list for all you expecting mamas or new mamas who need some guidance or help of advice I wish I could go back and tell myself. All in one place here, so no googling involved. I truly hope this helps and if not, just know that you will figure it out and it does get easier.

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Trust Your Mama Instinct/Gut

I truly believe mamas really do know what is best for our baby. I believe God has given us mamas wonderful intuition for a reason. It’s hard as a new mom not to look to others for advice or turn to Dr. Google because you just don’t know what is going on with your baby since you have never done it before but if you just take a breath and take a step back from all the information out there, you will know what to do. You know your baby best.

Don’t Compare Your Baby to Other Babies

Every baby is different. Every baby hits milestones and stages at different times. Some babies sleep really well, others don’t. Some babies cry all the time, some don’t. You get the picture. Just because your baby isn’t where another baby is doesn’t mean you are doing anything wrong. Embrace where your baby is and focus on your baby. You’ll be so much happier. I have to remind myself of this having two now.

It is okay to want a break

Becoming a new mom is a life changing event. You go from being able to do whatever you want and having all this freedom to not. It can be exhausting mentally and physically taking care of a new baby. I always felt guilty asking for help or wanting a break because I love my boys so much. But don’t feel guilty. You need a break every once in awhile otherwise your mental health will take a plunge. Fill that cup mama. You can’t pour from an empty one.

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Listen to your baby’s needs & Let your baby lead

I always got caught up in what the internet told me, or what my book told me, what other parents did, or even what my sons pediatrician told me. It’s okay to get advice from others, and listening to your pediatrician is all important but keep in mind that your baby isn’t the average baby.

For example, my first son was not the best sleeper. We struggled with naps big time and because of that, struggled with night sleep as well. I listened too much to what you should do and constantly looked at the number of hours he was getting. I was constantly worried that he wasn’t getting enough sleep. When I finally started paying attention to him and his individual sleep needs like his natural sleepy times and his sleep cues, things got easier and he started to sleep better. Of course there was advice I took from other moms and paid attention to awake times definitely helped but what made the big difference was taking that advice and adjusting it to fit his needs and personality.

Eventually, once you get to know your baby, you will figure out what each cry means and you’ll figure out what he/she needs.

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Let Go of Expectations

This was a hard lesson for me to learn. Before I had my son, I had all these expectations of what motherhood would be like. I expected my son to nap when he was tired. I expected to be able to keep up on the house while taking care of my baby. I expected breastfeeding to come naturally. I expected that once I found a routine with my son, it would stay the same. I expected my son to continue sleeping through the night once he slept through the night for a week straight (hello sleep regressions).

But motherhood is all about the unexpected. You cannot expect anything to go your way. Babies are always changing and once you think you have it all figured out. It changes. Letting go of all expectations and taking each day as it comes and going with the flow is the best way to approach motherhood.

I found myself frustrated and stressed when expected my baby to sleep or eat or play by himself, etc. but when I just finally decided to have no expectations, motherhood got a whole lot easier.

This is the best five pieces of advice I can give for new moms and even for moms who are expecting their second child or third child. I had to remind myself this which is what inspired me to write this post. I’d love to hear from you and if you have anything to add, comment below.