As a mom, my biggest obstacle has been discipline. I constantly feel like I’m doing it all wrong. Let’s just say I have learned how to keep my cool during toddler tantrums the hard way filled with lots and lots of mom guilt.
I have lost my cool on more occasions I would like to admit.
I have lost my patience and yelled many times.
I have completely shut down and lost on how to handle the situation when my boys throw tantrums.
I have gotten angry, frustrated, and let my temper get the best of me on multiple occasions.
Before having kids, I would like to think that I rarely lost my temper. I was super patient and pretty easy going. Fast forward to post kids, and I’m learning things about myself that are not so pretty. I’m learning that I don’t have a lot of self discipline when it comes to handling my emotions.
Turns out teaching my boys to handle their emotions is so hard when I don’t have a handle on mine.
I just want any other mama who is in my position that because you yelled at your kids or lost your cool…it doesn’t mean you are a bad mom. You are human. And it’s okay. Because now we get to use it as an opportunity to teach our kids that we make mistakes too. We can teach them that there is no shame in admitting you are wrong and apologizing.
Until then, please know that you are not alone. And there are some helpful resources out there to help navigate toddlers big emotions as well as you own. I love following @biglittlefeelings for guidance so be sure and check them out!
Here are some tips on how to keep your cool during toddler tantrums. These are tips I have learned that have helped me keep my composure during those intense moments during toddlerhood where you are constantly being tested by your toddlers behavior.
I am no expert. These are just the things I have learned through my experience. It has helped me and I hope it can help you as well.
Tip 1: Checking in with yourself and your needs is super important.
I do this in the morning and throughout the day. Make sure you are getting enough water, food, and when you start to feel burnt out…don’t be afraid to ask for some help. Schedule some time for yourself and fill your cup so you can be at your best.
Tip 2: Its so easy to give into your emotions in the moment and go straight to reacting without any thought.
But when we pause, take a breath or a quick mom break then we can have a better reaction to the situation. Sometimes I make sure my boys are in a safe place and I go into another room and calm myself down.
Related Posts:
Daily Affirmation For Mom Guilt
Did You Lose Your Identity In Motherhood? You Aren’t Alone
Tip 3: Sometimes Luke gets so worked up in his tantrum that I can’t get through to him.
This is where I am tempted to yell but I have learned that waiting until he calms down helps me to stay calm. Then we reconnect and talk about what just happened.
Tip 4: Reminding ourselves that when toddlers throw tantrums, it’s the only way they can express themselves.
Getting down to their height and validating their feelings…letting them know it’s okay makes all the difference.
Finally, I still have moments where I lose my cool despite all of the above and that is okay. Because again, we are human! Like I said in my previous post, apologizing and admitting our mistakes to our toddlers shows empathy and teaches our toddlers that it’s okay to make mistakes.
What are other ways you have learned that helps you keep your composure during tantrums?